Bob Marley – Love Quote

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♥ Kamiz

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Alone

You can’t help it, you know what you’re doing..

You possess a power so strong how can you not know?

Love, love, why does it feel like this..

Do you ever think of me.. I very much doubt.

You parade my mind so freely whenever you please and escape without warning.

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Confused and alone, I weep once more..

You walk into the distance and leave me out cold, in the rain with only your words wrapping me warm..

Your sick love for shelter.

What We hold, so pure it exceeds normal pleasures..

Ecstasy In a human form..

Luring me in, entering my veins..

Look up to the stars once more.. The moon is the only thing we share.

But you shall never know, and I shall never tell.

 
– By Fela Ella

♥ Kamiz

Free

I talk freely about my past because it has already happened to me.
I have no use of caressing the invisible scars and carrying burdens that have been dumped on me.

So I…
Drown the paper in ink,
Like the emotions did me.
That I too, may be as light as the paper once was.

♥ Kamiz

No Good Comes From Loving A Person Who Doesn’t Love You Back…

He has a constellation of freckles on his face and you’re busying trying to figure out how your name comes into it.

The words he utters puts you out of place, yet you still try to fit yourself in all the spaces he has created.

In the mist of everything. You try teach him how to love you, because you have loved all his imperfections, he was almost nothing without you.

Now you are the one out of place,  searching for affection in a shallow space.

You patiently wait for him to break out in a poem and utter sentimental words that make you feel at home.

Because you gave him bits of you, that he didn’t even deserve, now you consume scraps of love that you wouldn’t ( on a normal basis) even accept as a reseve.

You hug him like his hugs will protect you from him. But all it really does is break you. Because, you’re not from a broken home. So there is no way his hugs will fix your childhood.

You are just a fixer, loving everything that is broken. Like pebbles and stones, you collect broken people like tokens.

Their flaws, are the things that you desire. The same things that destroy you.

You tell him you love him, and all those words do, is bounce back, and cut your heart much deeper.

And you begin to believe that he reveals his love like he does his flaws, in secret and the dark, right between the sheets where he is most vulnerable. 

So when will it stop?
When you’re too broken that you no longer love yourself?
Or when loves someone else, who evidently doesn’t love him as much as you love him?
Or perhaps when he chases the 100th skirt and actually doesn’t come back?

See, no good comes from loving a person who doesn’t love you back…

♥ Kamiz

Misfits

Some people deem themselves Misfits, just to fit in.

Someone once asked me what exactly do I do, which makes me so “weird”.

Honestly?
That’s like asking me where was I, and what was thinking when I took my 672 473 219  breath.
Like there’s a Blueprint or method to this madness.

I just happen to do what I like, where I like. So what if it’s something the person next to me doesn’t like it? As long as I’m doing something I like, and being comfortable in my own skin while doing it, even after I’m done..

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♥ Kamiz

Cock Tease

I sit here and wonder why I am still single
I mean,
I’m a hopeless romantic,
With a slightly dirty mind,
Reasonably high standards,

Yet…

I’m still single.

Okay so, I recently went on a date,
And between the Mixed Berry Mojito and Nachos
My date managed to slip in a “Non-Offensive” comment which I almost chocked on actually,
‘Til I spat it out and chewed on it later that evening.

I could say a lot of things,
But in short, he called me a Cock Tease,
at that moment….
A part of me believed that I was.

Now according to the Urban Dictionary,

A Cock Tease means:

” a girl that leads a guy to believe that she’s going to have sex with him, then doesn’t.” 

But because I thirst for knowledge,
I continued reading…

Words like tease, slut, whore, skank, and tramp along…

No see, I really do not agree with those.

I am sitting trying to understand how not having sex with a guy automatically qualifies you to be a slut or whore.
But that’s a topic for another day.

Growning up,
I always found it rude when females would dismiss males,
Before they could even conclude their introduction.

I always wondered why they’d assume every guy wanted to get in their pants, before the poor guys could even state their intention.

See, when given a chance to do so,
Some males choke up in their “star struck” phase and aren’t even able to tell you their first name.
Others display a thousand reasons why we refer to males as dogs, or prove that wolves truly do come I sheep skin.
And others, well lets say, mom’s would be proud.

Now when a girl or woman is fully aware of the power she possess,
Whether it be in her face, her head, her curves, under her skirt or the way she flips her hair.
She will somehow take advantage of it.
Where it’s a mechanism to boost her self confidence that many believe she may already possess.
Or she’ll use her body and sexual organs to obtain materialistic things.

I get it, I’m a lil off topic
Let me just draw this closer to home…

Back to me,
Kamiz, the Cock Tease.
it doesn’t even rhyme…

Anyway,

I cannot help but think of all the times my “friendliness” had been taken out of context,
and occasionally gotten me into trouble.

See, when you engage some guys with a perfectly normal conversation, they tend to believe that you may interested, and that’s because many females barely do this.

From this, I found myself in many awkward situations, and telling guys off isn’t one of my strongest traits.

Now see,
I’ve always been taught to see the best in people…
Being Kind
Being loving
And compassionate.

So in many cases, I find myself unintentionally stringing a lot guys on.
And on good days my solar powered confidence my be perceived as sexiness.

I’ll admit,
Growning up, I wasn’t the most confident of beings
If anything, I found my confidence last year, in the mist of my independence.
And before then,
I’ll admit,
My confidence was powered by the heat of the passion ignited by the attention I’d receive from males at the verge of splitting my legs like Moses did the red sea, and just when feel I had received enough affirmation, I’d stop.
Yes this is the type of behaviour portrayed by a cock tease.

But now, I could really care less, because in the mist of pure, innocent confidence self love is a crucial factor.
I am no longer in pursuit of validation or affirmation.

I refuse to take responsibility for males reading my friendliness as an invitation of interest to engage in any form of sexual activity.

My Verdict:

I am Not A Cock Tease!

When I Became A Man – Caleb Jones

When I became a man
I put away childish things
But before I became a man
I didn’t always fit the shoes of a King
I was a child trying to find his way
The toys I played with kept my eyes occupied
And left my eyes in a lustful boyish frenzy
My playmates had long legs, short skirts and soft skin
They cared enough to lie down and wallow with me often
Jezebel turned out to be my very best friend
I’d look in her eyes before ever seeing the sunrise
Every time I paid her a visit and slept in

Before I became a man
I saw how God made Adam from dust
So likewise I tried to make love out of lust
I didn’t know any better
I was taught by example
“Let your mouth spit game, but never let your heart say much, ”
I treated his daughters like beauty pageant contestants
There would be zero return on their investments
Proverbs 31 was never a criterion for my selection
Keep in mind this was before I became a man

Before I became a man
I would unlock my curse and throw away the key
I allowed anger to set up a construction company inside
Bitterness never rested
It left no time wasted
Whether Father loved me or not
All I could regurgitate was hatred
I became allergic to showing any form of compassion

Before I became a man
I was much shorter
Not just in height but in spiritual insight
Because I never had a picture
Nor did Pixar ever have a film
Showing me what God’s man really looked like

But when I became man
Oh, When I became a man
I learned how to love Father God right back
Even though I’m good at falling short of the glory
I reflect on my story
Through my praise I’ll self publish a testimony

When I became a man
I learned how to cry
Because I’m not ashamed of my tears
Since I became a man
I’m not longer afraid of the dark
I’ll wrap my hands around James 5: 16
Confess, Pray, and Heal my Heart

I have discovered something
That there are medicinal qualities
Right down the corridor of introspection
When I became a man
I learned how to love her
My Esther, My Ruth
I learned how to honor her like she was Jesus’ mother
Because one day she’ll be pregnant
With the seed that will transport my legacy
So that my God and my name will both have longevity
Even after they bury me

I could not love her before
Because I was not able
My insecurities and my perfectionism had me
Looking in on the next best player
That was checking in at the scorer’s table
How could I possibly be her covering?
When I was an umbrella with holes in it
But I learned to love her like I ought to
Because I want Him to be my Father and my Father-in-law
Since that’s his daughter

When I became a man
I learned to love my brother
I’ll share my heart, my hug and my hallelujah
Because a hug and a hallelujah without my heart
Leaves room for his spirit to respond with “I never knew you”
I became a man so that when he became a man
He would know a man
Who picked up the gospel and put the toys away

When I became a man