Forever 21

I recently asked if I was somewhat weird or awkward for being 21 and still ( forever single), and I got the most surprising response which actually warmed my heart. I’d like to share it:

” Nothing wrong with you. 

If anything you are being more careful than most who would rush into a relationship. 

I have some words for you, if you will listen. 

Always, always, always listen to your gut. Even above your heart. If you wait, and are wise, there will come into your life a person who activates your heart AND your gut instincts. This is the person you will pursue, and hopefully marry. He will make you happier than you can imagine. 

Never, ever, ever have sex before marriage. Sex will destroy what foundation you have with him, and gives him your commitment without requiring his. There is nowhere left for him to go with you after sex, which is why you find so many confused women on this very site, wondering why a man has ceased all contact after they have sex with him. 

Be wise, be patient, and above all, work on yourself. Work on your heart. 

Learn to be vulnerable. Learn to be feminine-and LOVE being it. There is little more a delight to a man than a woman who loves being a woman, and loves being HIS woman. You would be a blessing that cannot be bought with money, gold, or diamonds, and would be worth far more than all of those things”

Thethundrawolf.

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Leaving this in the past…

I remember when you meant nothing to me.
We would talk for hours, but I was barely aware of your existence.
I will never forget how passion filled kisses changed all that.

You shifted a lot of things inside of me, but my tide remained still.
The more I repressed on the surface, the more you would sink in. 

I held back, but I slowly began feeling my heart drowning in a sea regret.

Some days I felt nothing for you, and others days, I felt you all at once.   

I’m not some emotionless bitch every one paints me to be, I actually long for affection.

And throughout all that time,  I suffered in silence, because I’ve always seen pain is weakness.

Quote

“I have grown to understand that I’m difficult to love, not because I’m broken, but  because I’m whole. I don’t give guys the luxury of loving me in parts. I love all of me whole heartedly, so it becomes difficult for a guy to squeeze through my insecurities to fill a void he might think I possess. I don’t get aroused by petty compliments.
See, some guys find joy in loving someone who’s broken so that they fix them, just to break them again.”

By Kamogelo Mopai

Extracted from my Validation piece which I’ll be posting later

Changed Direction

looking through the lies,

i can see through your disguise.

i know all your secrets of your soul;

deceit will never make you whole.

a hundred times you bruised my flesh,

i hid the wounds with pounds of mesh.

now i make eye contact with you,

after all the torment you put me through.

you’re not winning this game

i’ve changed the direction of the pain.

~Written by Sarah English

#abuse #poem #poetry #healing #spiritual healing

Mrs Blue Black Purple

She looks at me through blue, black and purple. 

Heavy rings around her eyes.

No ring on her finger.

Mentally enslaved.

Temporary bruises beneath her clothing.

Permanent scaring underneath her skin. 

The colours of her pain have substituted her friends.

He left her to choke.

She can no longer see his face.

She seems to have forgotten about grace.

She runs back into his arms like they’re her refuge.

I never understood the notion of looking for happiness in the same place you lost it.

She can no longer identify love.

Her solitude must taste like freedom.

She down plays her hurt…

Discredits her logic.

She no longer sees her beauty.

She believes loving him, is her duty.

She no longer loves herself.

It’s evident by the way she carries herself.

I watch her from the sidelines, and wish that I could erase every bad memory of hers, but I know those will eventually build her.

She looks at me through the colour of bruises and I hold her tightly because I know I’m the only one who sees this side of her.

And forever I will hold her as tight as I can.