Quote

Why is the devil so father-phobic?

“The devil has been trying to expunge every image that represents a loving faithful fathers from our culture. But why is the devil so father -phobic? Because he know that if  he can continue to destroy Galilee, through broken dads, it will keep us from discovering that there is a heavenly Father who can turn the fatherless into a family of His beloved ones ” 


-Ed Tandy McGlasson 

The Father You’ve Always Wanted 
What a beautiful book. 

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Stranger

I don’t know why I’m writing this,
But it kinda feels good…

I know you’re somewhere out there 
Probably reading this…

I’m assuming you’re a Stranger 
Who probably knows nothing about me
Because for long, those closest to me didnt even know I write poetry. 

So any judgments you make of me
Will be based on this poem,
Or perhaps the other poems I’ve written.
I like that!

I like how I can slightly control what you think of me.
Showing you my good,
My bad,
Or what you may regard as My ugly.

I like the idea of you formulating your opinion about me, based on that alone.

I know this won’t make much sense…
But I truly appreciate you & your presence.
I appreciate you taking time off your busy life,
Just to read words that I’ve managed to rip off my chest,  
Because those closest to me,
Those who swear they love me, 
Just don’t have the time… 

That’s what I like about you I guess
The fact that you’re here 
Actually giving a damn about me,
Or at least leading me an ear… 

At this very moment in time,
I can be anyone I want to be
Just to create the perfect first impression,
But instead,
I choose to be myself.
I’d like to have a chance to be loved for who, I am for once.
Even if it’s just for a moment..
I may never feel it,
But that mere thought will keep me going.

Either way Stranger,
I thank you… 
I thank for allowing me 
To make my first impression on you, 
For giving me a chance to start over,
For somehow making me feel loved…

We’ll probably never meet 
Or cross paths again…
This will probably eventually fade from your memories before dusk falls or the sun rises.
And I Will probably forget that I ever wrote this.  
but in this moment
Or souls have collided, 
And we will never be, like we once were…

Crutch

I loved you, when you were most broken.
Prayed every night, that you would be healed as sunrise awakens,
But every day, you would awaken,
With more and more breathes taken.

I see how pain radiates through your smile.
Knowing that your feet won’t walk a mile, without a crutch.
Eyes oblivious, to what was already seen.
Mind breaks between intervals of time  and space, while experiencing numbness.

And in between prayers of your healing and opening my eyes and seeing you,
I’d sit and think…
“Would I ever do this this for a another living being?”
I put so much time and energy just to watch you slowly wither away…

It pained me to see how you slept on promises molded in yesterday’s pain.
How touch, was the only emotion left,
The only thing you felt.

After all the support and love I selflessly handed to you
Your soul didn’t even have the decency to remain.
The same pillow you rested your legs on, now nest my tears.

Frustrated by how much I loved you, when you couldn’t even have the strength to love yourself.

The intensity of trust heightened, when I held you up, with my shoulder hosting your hand.

Realsing that you really had no where to run.
Forced to engage in more meaningful conversations that opened you up and left you vulnerable.

I valued our conversations.
They helped me understand that small talk will never be the root of deep conversations.
I now vow to never be mesmerised by talk that’s cheap.

Your love stories showed me the epitome of romance.
Through your eyes, I saw the life of a slow dance…

        In Memory of Matshidiso Mopai.
                    31 October 2004

♥ Kamiz

Already 6ft Under

Perhaps the death of my aunt made me completely stop believing in forever.
I swear you never know death until it discreetly enters your home and slowly destroys the one thing you love the most.

I swear I saw him drag the life out of her eyes.
That scumbag spat on her like wild mushrooms had already viciously covered her decomposed body.                                       
I could no longer feel her touch.
Her kisses where just dust.               
Death was robust in her bones.  
Her lust for life, was as hard as stone.

I would constantly feel wings brushing my side and my back.
Smell her scent, look around but find her 20 metres away just laying on her back watching her life wither away.

It was fucked up how he left her with her heart beating.
How dare he take her soul and leave me with a lifeless body.
Ahhh man, death is the devil himself.

image

♥ Kamiz

My Saint Valentine

I never believed in roses and chocolates

Or expressing a different kind of affectionate, materialistic love for a few hours,

But I did believe in Grandpa.

He was a Valentines Baby,

Born on the 14th of February,

And born with a lot of love to give.

I didn’t realise this until passed.

He was the bonding glue that brought the family together,

And now that he’s no longer here,

I can feel it,

Like a shattered heart with pieces splitting directly from contact.  

Because now, we’ve all lost contact.         

♥ Kamiz