Pursuit

Fully aware that you pursue me in only in draped skies-

Because I am born of light.

When your own darkness consumes you

And you don’t have the desire to be devoured anymore

You knock on my door

And like the fool that I am- I open

With arms wide open

And a mind filled with naive thoughts that you won’t hurt me-

Yet you leave me in your darkness like you have before

Mind helplessly swimming in confusion

Unable to derifrienciate our demons

Because yours make themselves feel so much at home

In my own

They take up all the empty spaces, that I don’t even notice you leaving

You’re foolish for leaving me with your demons Because they will always find you

And wholely consume you

I am born of light, it’s only a matter of time before they’re blinded by me.

They find comfort in your solitude

Darkness is no Stranger to you

And you will come knocking on my door

And again, I’ll let you in

But this time

Leave your shoes and demons at the door

I am tired of your sole walking all over me.

I hate that you’re the one door I am unable to close

You drain me.

02 June 2016

22:23

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Sinful White Linen

Laying in sinfully white linen,

Covering the remains of my body,

Which are drenched in sex and loneliness.

Unable to fathom the debt I paid for love,

Because no one is able to hold me once you’re gone.

Not only am I swimming in your sweat,

I’m drowning in thoughts of you,

Unable to utter another man’s name.

Unable to spit out the sins I effortlessly swallowed last night.

Unable to get you out of my head…

Because the Coffee I wanted so bad,

Landed up being the Coffin I eagerly buried myself in.

I can’t help but reminisce about how bad I longed for your kiss,

The same kiss which happened to suck out my soul, along with my logic.

I am as unfamiliar with my surroundings as I am to myself.

A constellation of regret lays swift the window seal,

As I did on the bed, waiting to be consumed by your darkness,

Because the stars and I aren’t strangers to the one thing that makes us Come alive…

A Mile; In Suicidal Shoes

you’re not a bad person for the way you kill your sadness…

Each pill dissolving on your tongue, the way you wished your pain would.

But pain is not like people,
you can’t just talk it away,

And people aren’t simple,
you cannot force them to stay.

99 pills at once,

Like problems shoved down your throat.

Difficult to swallow.

Difficult to breathe.

life isn’t easy.

Death is a breeze.

your living pain is unbearable,
And you can’t wait to leave.

Coping, are your eyes,
Struggling to stay awake.

Starved is your heart,
Unable to eat joy.

Confused is your mind,
How could misery be so happy, when it always has you in mind.

No suicide note.

No one deserves to know how frozen their coldness left you.

How their ghostly words
that escaped their tongue
now haunt you-
Like you will now haunt them.

You’ve managed to stop the world from spinning.

Slowly floating away.

Never felt anything so great.

Embracing you body for the fight, maybe now, it too, will understand the scars you placed above every vain.

It too, will fully feel the pain you’ve been exposed to.

You hoping nothing goes wrong, because it’s way too right.

So light as a feather,
is this moment.
Unable to feel the ground.

You feel rest,
Drowning in peace.

As your troubled soul escapes from you

Happy,

That no one is nearby to save you.

Happiness like this doesn’t last
It turns into pain of the past.

you clinch every single part of you.

Then finally

With your last breath

YOU.ARE.FREE