I AM AMAZING
but that does not mean that the men I come into contact with will acknowledge that or even give me the light of day, even if it’s just for a second.
And I cannot fault them because they are in pursuit of other things. Meaning, they don’t even have time to marvel at my beauty bursting from deep inside.
They just simply notice the aftermath which consists of my beautifully constructed features, which happen to fit in with their desire.
And by pursuing it, they completely annihilating everything that is truly me.
Note to Self:
I need to stop seeking validation in the hands of the men who will never love me.
Holy Spirit, please show me the junk in my life that offends You. Cause it to, offends me like it does You. Let it smell like old trash to me. And Father, help me to trade this garbage for the full life You promised me.
I’m unlearning the love I carelessly used to give, just to say “I too, have love on my plate”
Hoping that no one will notice that I dished up seconds, on somebody else’s dirty plate.
Each day I learn a little more about intimacy.
It’s not about two people exchanging moments of lust filled with pleasure
It’s more of an exchange of temporary forevers